Fill Your Cup First, to Fill Others...
PICTURE THIS
Your mind and soul are not there while you socialize with friends. You wish you could sneak out. But your friends dragged you along, and you are there. Or, you have your parents' friends at your place, and they insist you attend them all along; you feel out of place but have no option. Each time you want to be on your own, you are seeking time alone. You want a space to be with yourself, away from distractions that weigh you down, people who do not add value to your emotional and mental well-being, or those who sap you of your energy.
ALONE-TIME IS NORMAL
The need for that alone-time is normal. But accepting the need or want like this is what many find unreasonable and weird. The reason is one's conditioning, where being alone is considered miserable, pathetic, and mentally and emotionally draining.
Being alone-
- does not mean you are unproductive, lazy, anti-social, doing nothing, or surrounded by emptiness and lack of social acceptance and security.
- is not something that is forced upon you, something that adversely affects your well-being.
- is not just an introvert's choice.
- is something each of us wants or needs at some point. The reasons could be varied, though.
Alone-time is often misconstrued as loneliness. Loneliness is a state of mind, for one can be lonely even amid a crowd or own people or with someone not invested in the connection or interaction. Yes, loneliness can affect our mental, emotional, and physical well-being in the long run.
WHY DO WE NEED TIME ALONE?
We all need to slice out that alone-time from our everyday lives to savor who we are. We need time to focus on what we want and where we are in the larger scheme of life.
- Time alone helps us know ourselves better.
- It provides us with the scope to recharge and rejuvenate ourselves.
- It allows us to disconnect and connect with things that matter more to us, those that have lost their essence in our busy lives.
- Constructively carving alone-time enhances one's individuality, focusing on personal growth and well-being.
Steal our time out if we have to, unapologetically. It creates a therapeutic effect on us and the people around us. If we are rejuvenated, recharged, and refreshed, we will send positive energy to those around us. We can liven up other's life when we are fresh. How can we fill another's cup when ours is empty?
WAYS TO CARVE OUT ALONE-TIME
There are ways to carve out our alone-time if we really crave it. Nothing should hold us back from doing so, for self-care or self-prioritizing is not always a selfish act.
- Saying ‘No’ as often as needed, assertively, and unapologetically.
- Setting our boundaries and setting them firm.
- Making it normal, a routine that needs to be honored and followed by us and others.
- Indulging in constructive activities that interest us and enhance our growth.
- Connecting to our core through meditation or other practices of mindfulness.
- Pacing our mind and thoughts to gain clarity.
- Prioritizing self-care and making ourselves, a priority.
- Importantly, considering this time alone as a revitalizer.
A JOURNEY WITHIN
It is high time we regained our lost relationship with ourselves. We must stop getting victims of that herd mentality where we just follow the crowd. We must normalize standing for ourselves, prioritizing ourselves, and setting healthy boundaries to protect our inner peace and nourish our souls. Being alone is a way to work on ourselves, disconnect, and connect within.
© PURVI MEHTA
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